Chapter 2

No matter what I sent, Shen Bai neither answered nor accepted.

It was the first piece of gold jewelry I'd ever owned.

The thought of losing it hurt.

Desperate times.

Request message:

[If you still don't reply, I'll assume you're too hard to type.]

Three seconds later:

[S. has accepted your friend request. The messages above are your greeting.]

I renamed him “Beast in Human Skin.”

[Transfer: 50.00 yuan]

Shen Bai didn't accept the money.

What did that mean?

Not enough?

Me: [Just tell me what you want. We can negotiate. I'm easy to talk to.]

S.: [This user has shared their location.]

S.: [Come and get it.]

Me: [Now? It's after nine. That's awfully late.]

Me: [Tomorrow morning. I'll collect it at the hospital.]

Me: [Accept the money. I keep my promises. I said I'd give you fifty yuan, and I will.]

S.: [Then I'll throw it away.]

Attached:

[A photo of the bracelet dangling from his index finger outside a window.]

Me: [I'll be there in twenty minutes.]

6

Twenty minutes later, I reached the building at the address he'd sent.

Me: [I'm here. Could you activate the elevator for me?]

I waited in the elevator.

And waited.

Bastard!

Cursing silently, I climbed ten floors on foot.

By the time I arrived, I could barely breathe.

There was only one apartment on the floor. Its door stood open, the interior pitch-black.

“Shen Bai?”

No answer.

Puzzled, I stepped inside.

Bang!

The door slammed shut.

I spun around, but before I could make out the person in front of me, I was pinned against it.

Reeking of alcohol, Shen Bai kissed me fiercely. His voice was anything but polite, thick with mockery.

“Oh? You keep your promises?”

“Xu Ke, how can you even say that?”

“In that case, let's work through everything you wrote to me back then. One thing at a time.”

“Hip thrusts while standing on my head? What else was there? Let me think.”

The pressure against my lips could hardly be called a kiss.

It was closer to biting.

I struggled and made muffled protests, with no idea why he'd suddenly lost his mind.

I had to part my lips to breathe.

He immediately overwhelmed me, leaving me no room to evade him.

I don't know how long it went on. Eventually, he pinned both my wrists above my head with one hand. With the other, he lifted my chin.

Our noses nearly touched.

“Recognize this position? You wrote it in chapter fourteen.”

“Xu Ke, you did this to me. How could you just disappear? You dragged me down into that abyss. What gave you the right to leave me there alone?”

“Can you only write about using your tongue? What happened to all those kisses you described—the gliding ones, the ones that leave teeth marks, sucking, deep kissing, pushing, biting? No hurry. We'll try them one by one and find out which you like.”

Then he bent to kiss me again.

I couldn't take this.

I pounded desperately on his chest.

“Stop! I'm wet.”

Shen Bai went rigid.

He looked down at me, his eyes darkening.

The wildness in his expression cracked, revealing shock, confusion, and a trace of embarrassment.

“W-what did you say?”

“My feet are wet. Really. Feel them if you don't believe me.”

“Could you stop kissing me? They'll smell if they're wet.”

That sobered him up instantly.

Once again, he was that elegant, ethereal creature above the mortal world, staring blankly at me.

I thought he didn't believe me.

“I'll take them off and show you. They really are wet.”

I removed my shoes and socks.

Then I lifted a foot in front of him.

“See? Wet, aren't they?”

“I have sweaty feet. They sweat when I'm nervous.”

I bent down and sniffed.

With a disgusted pout, I lowered my foot.

Shen Bai's expression defied description.

“You… meant your feet were wet?”

“Yes. What else?”

“When I kiss you, the only place you feel anything is your feet?”

Well…

Actually, I felt it everywhere.

But judging by his face, he wouldn't believe me even if I told him.

I might as well keep quiet and let him think what he liked.

“Hah. Xu Ke. You really are a cold, heartless monster.”

Now he was insulting me?

I angrily held out my hand.

“Give me back my bracelet. You're not getting the money. You got drunk and made a scene just now, so consider that payment. We're even.”

His eyes darkened, and his face turned cold.

“Even? Not that easy.”

I was running out of patience.

“What do you want, then?”

“Be with me.”

“Until I get tired of you.”

7

I frowned, ready to refuse.

But I couldn't quite shake the feeling that I was partly in the wrong.

Had everything I'd done back then tarnished something pure in his heart? Had I turned that untouchable creature into this madman?

If so, I did bear some responsibility.

Perhaps deleting my spare account and vanishing from his life without so much as an apology or a goodbye email had set him off.

Perhaps that was why he'd made such an outrageous demand.

He wanted to end things on his own terms. Take control of his life again.

Looked at that way, it wasn't entirely incomprehensible.

Surely it wouldn't last long.

I could wait until he said it was over.

If that was what he needed to consider us truly even, I was willing to cooperate.

“All right.”

Shen Bai seemed startled by how readily I'd agreed.

The cold, cutting expression vanished, leaving him looking lost.

Something in me ached at the sight of him like that, as though his mind had come apart.

“Shen Bai, you must really hate me.”

Go on!

Tell me everything!

Let's clear the air!

Once he'd got it all out, he'd feel better, and we could settle things sooner.

He seemed to sink into a painful memory.

His face went pale. His lips trembled as he began listing my “crimes.”

“You were always following me.”

“After I left the library, you… you even put your head down on the desk I'd used and took your nap there.”

“You wrote all those sweet words, saying you loved me.”

“You stood beneath the men's dormitory, looking up at the balconies for my underwear.”

“You… you were everywhere. There was nowhere I could hide.”

…

Oh, God.

The secret crush I'd once found so touching looked rather different from the other side.

More like a perverted stalker.

I was mortified. All I wanted was to make amends and undo the damage I'd done.

“Shen Bai! Tell me what you want. If it's something I can do, I'll agree!”

Deep suspicion filled his eyes.

The wariness and insecurity of someone who'd been deceived and toyed with.

I raised three fingers and swore beneath the light bulb overhead.

“I mean it. I'm not lying this time. Will you believe me?”

He watched me for a long time, as if trying to verify something.

His lips pressed together. At last he spoke slowly.

“Xu Ke, will you cling to me the way you used to?”

!!!

I thought I'd misheard.

But he repeated it.

Every word clear and certain.

My instinct was to refuse.

I didn't want to do those awful things again.

But my oath was still ringing in my ears.

I couldn't possibly go back on it now.

“If… if you don't mind, then… all right.”

Perhaps recreating the past would let him return to that moment, almost as though he were living it again, and take charge of his life. Change everything himself.

Once I'd agreed, he gave me the bracelet.

“You can go. I'm tired.”

“Of course. Get some rest. I won't bother you.”

My hand had just touched the door handle when his quiet voice came from behind me.

“Xu Ke, is this what you call ‘clinging to me the way you used to’?”

Huh?

We'd started already?

Pop quizzes at any moment?

I turned around and thought for a moment, then ventured uncertainly,

“I shouldn't go? Let me stay? I want to breathe the same air as you? Drink from your cup? Use your razor to shave?”

Apparently you couldn't even empathize with your own past self.

Things I'd said so easily in my early twenties were almost impossible to get out now, however red my face turned.

Having said them, I braced myself to stay and play the creep.

Shen Bai said softly,

“Didn't you hear me? I told you to go. I'm tired.”

Fuck.

Bastard.

8

Was he messing with me?

I stormed downstairs.

Shen Bai was the real creep. Did he like playing the elusive target, making me chase him and then tormenting me with that cold attitude?

Fine!

Who was afraid of whom?

From that day on, I dutifully clung to him.

My services included, but were not limited to, sending him male-voice wake-up calls in the morning, complete with the sound of a massage gun relaxing muscles, and ordering lunch deliveries with a note:

[Remember to wear your white coat tonight~]

After work, I followed him on my electric scooter…

I didn't understand what was fun about any of this.

But he seemed so happy.

Oh, no. Had he really gone mad?

And worse…

Could he be interested in me?

The fleeting thought took root in my head. However hard I tried, I couldn't shake it.

When I went on pestering him, I even began to feel as though we were a young couple in love.

Without anyone noticing, my heart quietly fell.

Three days later, Shen Bai told me to come for my follow-up.

As I waited at the hospital, several young nurses walked past, chatting.

“Looks as though we'll be going to Dr. Shen's wedding this year.”

“Dr. Shen Bai and the deputy director's daughter look like they stepped out of a movie together. Both so highly educated and accomplished. A perfect match.”

“But I heard some female patient with big breasts and no brains has been clinging to him lately. Won't that affect things between him and his girlfriend?”

“As if! She makes him so sick he wants to throw up.”

…

They dissolved into laughter.

I laughed too.

At myself.

Xu Ke, you idiot. He was obviously taking revenge, and you actually thought he liked you.

Now all I wanted was for him to get his revenge over with.

To end this.

In the consulting room, Shen Bai immediately noticed me avoiding his eyes.

“What's wrong?”