Chapter 1

My husband sent me to the bedchamber of the most powerful minister at court.

He traded me for an official post. By rights, I ought to have been so ashamed that I dashed my head against a wall and died.

Yet at daybreak, that minister straightened my disordered robe, bent toward me, and asked, “He brought you here himself. Do you hate him?”

Remembering how the bedding had been changed twice last night, I honestly shook my head.

“No.”

He gently wiped a tear from the corner of my eye and watched me for a long time.

“Then why are you crying?”

I looked at his outrageously handsome face, feeling no shame at all.

“Last night… was too much fun.”

Pei Zhao laughed. His chest, pressed against my back, shook twice.

Years of authority at court made officials take another road rather than encounter him. His face was so cold and proper that even in a sleeping robe, he made people afraid to look straight at him.

“Zhao Wan, your temperament is very much to my taste.

“That fine husband of yours sent you here with a secret thrown in.”

Leaning on a soft pillow, I waited.

His palm rested on my lower belly as he explained. He had been wounded in the northern frontier years ago. The imperial physicians said fathering children would be difficult.

But Song Jing’an claimed I conceived easily. If I bore the Grand Secretary a child, that would be his gift in exchange for a lucrative post.

Only then did I remember an old physician examining my pulse before my marriage. He said I had abundant blood and vitality and need not worry about children.

Song Jing’an had called the remark unlucky. In three years of marriage, the times he touched me could be counted on one hand. Now he used that very remark to purchase advancement.

There had been a reason for the wine he coaxed me to drink last night too.

It contained a drug that made me dazed and feverish.

The sedan went from the Song residence’s rear gate straight to the Grand Secretary’s. He hadn’t even given me a scrap of red cloth to preserve appearances.

I was so angry I laughed.

“So he sent me here as a breeding sow and expects me to clear his road to office?”

“Crude, but accurate.”

Pei Zhao lowered his head beside my ear. His hot breath tickled.

“I was very satisfied last night.

“If you truly conceive, I’ll see that the child is born above ten thousand others.”

Watching him fasten his belt, my first thought was not of reputation, but how furious Song Jing’an would be when he found out.

Before leaving, Pei Zhao turned back.

“Will you come again tonight?”

“If you aren’t afraid of wearing yourself out, my lord, what have I to fear?”

Amusement touched his eyes. Then he opened the door and left.

Only now could I survey the room’s disarray.

A broken tie still hung from a bedpost. Two sets of clothing lay scattered below, impossible to tell apart.

Embarrassment came late. I buried my face in the quilt and lay silent a moment.

Then I thought of Song Jing’an waiting at home for news. A little shame seemed a small price.

If he could give his lawful wife away as a gift, I dared make that gift his lifelong retribution.

When my sedan returned, my legs still ached. I deliberately walked more steadily than usual.

Song Jing’an and his mother were discussing bringing his cherished love into the household. They had even settled which courtyard Su Wantang would occupy.

His mother glanced at my collar, then slammed her teacup down.

“You dare come back? You’ve disgraced the entire Song family! Go kneel in the ancestral hall!”

Song Jing’an occupied the seat of honor without a trace of guilt for giving away his wife.

“Wantang arrives next month. Yield your position to her and settle down as a concubine.

“She’s kind. She won’t mistreat you.”

That made me laugh.

Gripping the table’s edge, I overturned it.

Hot tea and cakes flew over mother and son.

My mother-in-law shrieked at the scalding. As Song Jing’an sprang up, I slapped him.

“A beast who gives away his wife dares lecture me about womanly virtue?

“You drugged me and carried me to another man’s bed. Now you want me to make room for your precious love? Where did you get that nerve?”

His mother rushed to seize my hair.

I kicked her back beside the chair.

Clutching his face, Song Jing’an raised a hand. I offered my cheek.

“Hit me. Best make sure I can’t get out of bed.

“When the Grand Secretary’s people come tonight, you can serve him in my place.”

His hand hung in the air. He could neither strike nor lower it.

One finger at a time, I pried it open and reminded him quietly, “You haven’t received the post you bought with me. Kill me first, and aren’t you afraid the Grand Secretary will strip off that official robe too?”

The red mark on his face stood out all the more. But he didn’t dare touch me again.

I returned to my courtyard and slept. Only toward dusk did I have my maid dress my hair.

An ebony carriage stopped at the gate.

The Grand Secretary’s guards stood in two lines. Even the gatekeeper dared not raise his head.

Before boarding, I turned and smiled at Song Jing’an.

“Sleep well tonight, Husband. Don’t dream of me.”

The curtain fell.

Rubbing my still-sore waist, I thought I must work a little harder for my dignity tonight.

Song Jing’an could not swallow the insult.

The next day, he brought forward the event planned for the following month.

Originally, he meant to wait until his appointment was settled, then welcome Su Wantang with a proper wedding.

Now that he had lost face, he abandoned appearances altogether. He wanted me to see that he still ruled the Song residence.

Servants bustled about pasting red paper, but none dared borrow anything from my courtyard.

Yesterday’s overturned table had taught them: whoever rushed fastest to serve my mother-in-law would be beaten first.

I had just returned from Pei Zhao’s early that morning when Su Wantang arrived in a pink sedan.

She wore soft peach-colored clothes. Not even a string of firecrackers greeted her.

She claimed not to care. Yet her first act inside was to urge a serving woman to summon me to the main hall.

My mother-in-law had prepared a kneeling cushion and tea.

Song Jing’an ordered me down.

“Wantang’s reputation is spotless. You know what you are now.

“Serve her tea. From now on, remember your place before her.”

She lifted the cup and softly urged him not to be angry.

Turning to me, however, she let triumph show in her smile.

“You worked hard last night, Sister. Leave serving our husband to me from now on. You can have a little rest.”

I took the cup, glanced at it, and threw the tea over her new clothes.

Screaming, she fled into his arms.

My mother-in-law immediately ordered a rattan whip.

Several burly serving women closed in. Then measured footsteps sounded outside.

“Rewards from His Excellency the Grand Secretary!”

Guards carried in six chests.

When the lids opened, jewels and brocade lit the room.

After announcing the gifts, their commander added publicly, “His Excellency says Madam Zhao’s delightful disposition pleases him greatly.

“If anyone so much as scratches her skin, we will hold them accountable.”

The serving women dropped the whip at once.

Su Wantang leaned against Song Jing’an, paler than when the tea scalded her.

I patted the soft cushion on the seat of honor, sat properly, and pointed at the kneeling cushion by her feet.

“You wanted to establish household rules. As it happens, so do I.

“Have Sister Liu kneel and serve tea to the lawful wife.”

Su Wantang clutched Song Jing’an’s sleeve. Tears came on command.

“Husband…”

He looked at the commander’s sword and did not raise his head for a long time.

The commander drew an inch of steel.

“Does Lord Song have another arrangement?”

“Wantang… serve the tea.”

She stared at him, disbelieving.

In the end, she knelt beside the broken porcelain and raised the cup again.

“Sister… please have some tea.”

I accepted, barely touched it to my lips, and set it down.

“A concubine must follow a concubine’s rules. Don’t wear the principal wife’s true red, and don’t keep offering to serve my husband for me.

“Whom Song Jing’an sleeps with is his business. Don’t bring that filth to disgust me.”

Tears fell onto her hands.

This time, she dared not utter a single coaxing word.

Watching beside her, my mother-in-law ached with sympathy. Afraid the commander would hear, she could only mouth an instruction to endure for now.

When Su Wantang looked up, she met my gaze.

She immediately hid her resentment, but her hands shook around the tea tray.

Her mouth fought for Song Jing’an’s affection.

Her eyes never left the seat of honor and the reward chests.