No Regrets in Leaving

Chapter 1

Edward Quan ·

In the seventh year of our marriage, Lu Wenjing secretly kept a mistress in the south of the city.

Everyone in the capital praised his integrity and his devotion to his wife. Lord Lu would not even walk down the street outside a brothel.

Yet he held that woman in his arms and laughed. “Ruan Qingwu? She's only fit to mind those lifeless account books for me.”

For seven years, I had preserved his family's fortune. For seven years, I had paved his way through officialdom.

When I left the residence, he thought I was going outside the city to light a votive lamp and pray for his safety.

No. I was going to burn the ladder he had climbed to the clouds.

1.

It was barely light when I left the Lu residence.

Old Zhou, the gatekeeper, was sweeping fallen pagoda-tree blossoms from the entrance. Seeing me in a slightly worn moon-white cloak, carrying only a blue cloth bundle, he hastily put down his broom.

“Going outside the city to offer incense, madam?”

He had served the Lu family for twenty years and always held his tongue. Even if half a bolt of silk went missing from my courtyard, he never asked questions. Today, he could not help himself: there was neither carriage nor maid behind me.

I put the keys into his hand.

“I'm not going to offer incense. I'm going to take back what belongs to me.”

His expression changed. Before he could ask anything more, Mrs. Song, who sold tofu at the end of the lane, came along with her basket.

She greeted me with a beaming smile.

“Madam Lu, off to meet Lord Lu after court again? What an enviable couple you are. Only yesterday, my daughter-in-law said you couldn't find a more loving husband in all the capital.”

I paused and smiled.

“Yes. I'm going to meet him after court.”

Before, I had met him to bring him home. Today, I would bring him before the authorities.

The carriage waited at the end of the lane. A Ling was driving. She had come with me when I married, and she was as quick and sharp as a blade. As I approached, she lifted the curtain and spoke quietly.

“My lady, the house in the south of the city is surrounded. Xie Roujia stayed there last night. Lu Wenjing's private seal and several letters are there too.”

I climbed in.

When I married Lu Wenjing seven years ago, A Ling was still young, her eyes always red with indignation on my behalf. The Ruan family might have fallen on hard times, she said, but the shops, fields, and estates Mother left me were a substantial dowry. What right had the Lu family to look down their noses and say I was marrying above my station?

Lu Wenjing had taken my hand then and promised to protect me for life.

I believed him.

Later, he passed the examinations and entered official service. The Lu family needed a house, money to cultivate connections, a famous physician for the old madam, funds for entertaining his fellow scholars. Each time, he said that once his position was secure, he would repay me with interest.

Seven years passed. Not a coin of the debt was repaid. Instead, the jade pendant Mother left me ended up around his mistress's neck.

Last night, A Ling put it into my hand.

A tiny character, Wu, was carved on the back. Along the edge was the crack I had made as a child.

I gripped it without shedding a tear.

When the heart has grown utterly cold, tears become the most useless things of all.

“My lady.” A Ling handed me a thin account book. “After court today, Lu Wenjing is going to the Ministry of Revenue to submit a request for additional funds for the Yong'an River flood-control works. Xie Roujia's brother, Xie Cheng'an, is the stone contractor. You were right. He used your money to buy favors, and now he wants treasury silver to plug the Xie family's shortfall.”

I opened the book.

I had painstakingly unearthed these entries from the Lu household's general accounts. Lu Wenjing thought I knew nothing beyond household provisions and fine fabrics. He did not know that Mother had once managed half the accounts of the river transport guild. Before illness took her, the first thing she taught me was how to read a ledger.

Accounts could lie. Silver could not.

“The Court of Judicial Review first,” I said.

A Ling stared.

“Not south to arrest them?”

“What would be the fun in that?” I closed the book. “Let Xie Roujia think she still has a way out. Once she learns Lu Wenjing never intended to marry her, she'll be more eager to talk than anyone.”

The wheels rolled over the stone paving toward Zhuque Street.

I looked back once at the plaque over the Lu residence.

I had paid for that house. Yet there the words LU RESIDENCE stood, as grand as could be.

After today, it ought to have its original name back.

2.

Outside the Court of Judicial Review stood a young man in black official robes.

He had fine features and prominent brows, but the oil-paper parcel in his hand made him look as though he had just bought pastries at the morning market.

Seeing me alight, he dispensed with ceremony and handed the parcel to A Ling.

“Red-bean cakes from the south of the city. Eat them while they're hot.”

A Ling glared.

“Deputy Chief Justice Pei, you asked my lady here to investigate a case, and now you're fobbing us off with cakes?”

Pei Zhaoye raised an eyebrow.

“The case has been opened. The cakes are for the person who's been running errands all night.”

He was deputy chief justice of the Court of Judicial Review, and the only son of an old friend of Father's. After Father died, the Ruan relatives scattered. Only Pei Zhaoye still lit incense for him every Qingming.

Last night, I had sent A Ling to him with a letter containing only two lines: Lu Wenjing had appropriated his wife's property and was suspected of embezzlement connected to the flood-control works. The evidence was in the south of the city.

Before dawn, he had completed every formality he could.

“Miss Ruan.”

He had changed the way he addressed me.

I looked at him.

“I'm not divorced from Lu Wenjing yet.”

“Then we'll begin preparing today.” His voice was even. “Your accounts prove only that he used your dowry. To connect him to the flood-control works, we still need Xie Cheng'an and the contracts in his possession. Our men will watch the south of the city. If you wish to go yourself, I'll accompany you.”

I smiled faintly.

“Aren't you afraid of inviting trouble?”

“Yes,” he said at once. “But I'm more afraid of watching someone use the fortune your father left you to hoist himself higher in office.”

Pei Zhaoye had never been one for pretty speeches.

His father had once been broken by a wrongful case. No one angered him more than officials who hid behind a veneer of propriety.

So he did not tell me to endure, or speak of a marriage lasting a lifetime.

He only asked what I wanted.

“A divorce agreement, my dowry, and for Lu Wenjing to pay for what he's done.”

He nodded.

“Then we'll take them back, one by one.”

Two pomegranate trees grew outside the small house in the south of the city. Its windows were tightly shut, but a woman's weeping carried from the courtyard.

We did not enter. We sat in the teahouse opposite. Before long, a carriage with blue curtains stopped at the door, and Lu Wenjing stepped out. In his dark-red court robes, his jade belt perfectly straight, he still had the handsome face all Shangjing admired.

Before entering, he turned to adjust his collar.

As though someone he secretly cherished waited inside.

A Ling's hands shook with anger.

“My lady, I'd love to shoot an arrow straight through his official's hat.”

“Not yet.” I raised my teacup. “Let him wear that wretched hat a little longer. He won't have another chance for the rest of his life.”

An hour later, the door opened.

Xie Roujia hurried after him in tears, her hair disheveled, clutching his sleeve.

“You promised! Once the flood-control business was settled, you'd bring me into your household. You said Ruan Qingwu wouldn't object!”

He shook her off, his face thunderous.

“When did I ever say that? Roujia, stop making trouble. Your brother's shortfall still hasn't been covered. If you make this public, no one will be able to protect you.”

She stared at him.

“What about the child I'm carrying?”

Lu Wenjing stiffened.

I put down my cup.

So there was that too.

Xie Roujia was no fool. Born into a merchant family, she had spent years helping her brother with the shop accounts. She had long since seen that Lu Wenjing coveted the Xies' trading network as well. She was desperate for a recognized position because she feared becoming something her family traded away to cover its losses.

Lu Wenjing wanted only her silence.

He lowered his voice.

“You cannot keep the child. I'll have medicine sent tomorrow.”

Her face turned paper-white. Suddenly, she raised her hand and slapped him hard.

The crack was audible across the street.

Furious, Lu Wenjing raised his hand to strike back. Just then, the head constable beside Pei Zhaoye stepped forward and saluted.

“Lord Lu, the Court of Judicial Review requires your presence in connection with a case. Please come with us.”

His hand stopped in midair.

He looked toward me.

Across the passing crowd, our eyes met.

First came surprise, then the resentment of a man who felt himself affronted.

Perhaps, in his view, I had no business being there. I ought to have been at the Lu residence preparing his lunch, waiting for him to come home so I could pretend to know nothing.

I rose and walked over.

“Lord Lu.”

He suppressed his anger.

“Qingwu, why are you with people from the Court of Judicial Review?”

“Because I reported the case.”

His pupils contracted.

I took the pendant from my sleeve and held it before him.

“Did you ask my permission before using my mother's keepsake to please your mistress?”

The people around us gradually fell silent.

He reached to snatch it. I stepped back.

“You took my dowry to pay the Xie family's debts. Now you mean to replace it with flood-control funds. Lu Wenjing, when you called me a vase fit only for display, did you ever consider that once the vase broke, all the filthy water inside would spill over your head?”

His expression darkened.

“Nonsense.”

“The Court of Judicial Review will determine that.”

Pei Zhaoye raised a hand. The head constable immediately fitted Lu Wenjing with a cangue.

Xie Roujia stood at the door, staring at him. At last, she understood. Lu Wenjing meant to give her no future, and her child no chance to live.

Suddenly, she laughed until tears poured down her face.

“Lu Wenjing, you're finished.”

3.

By that afternoon, news of his arrest had spread throughout Shangjing.

Old Madam Lu was the first to rush to the Court of Judicial Review.

Supported by a maid, she was weeping so hard she could barely stand. The moment she saw me, she lunged to seize my arm.

“Qingwu, you and Wenjing are husband and wife! Even if he lost his head for a moment, you can't have him stripped of office and put in prison!”

I stepped aside.

She missed and nearly fell. Someone hurried to catch her. She promptly sat on the ground, stamping her feet and wailing. The Ruan daughter was vicious, she cried. Lu Wenjing had treated me well all these years. I wanted to ruin my husband's family over a few shops.

A sizeable crowd had gathered. People were already whispering.

I went up to her and spoke quietly.

“If you wish to discuss what we owe each other, let's do just that.”

A Ling immediately unfolded a list.

“The Lu residence cost three thousand eight hundred taels, paid from my dowry. When Lord Lu first entered the Hanlin Academy, cultivating his fellow scholars, buying books, and hosting banquets cost twelve hundred taels, paid from my dowry. Your annual ginseng and tonics cost sixteen hundred taels over seven years, paid from my dowry.”

Old Madam Lu's sobs caught in her throat.