My Life Is My Own

Chapter 3

Edward Quan ·

“They're short of money,” Madam Zhou said.

“Master Pei was transferred away last year, then lost his post. Their farm estates were flooded too.”

“Madam Jiang's birth family has gambling debts. The Peis have bailed them out twice.”

“Jinghe wants an appointment through the Ministry of Personnel's recommendation system this year. That takes money as well.”

The Peis wanted my dowry, but feared that once married, I'd insist on managing it myself.

If I entered their house under a cloud of unchastity, I'd never be able to hold my head up.

Madam Jiang could claim she'd done me the kindness of concealing my disgrace, then use that debt to take my keys and property deeds.

If I refused to marry, they could blame the Shens, keep the betrothal gifts, and even demand compensation.

They'd thought of everything.

Unfortunately, they hadn't reckoned on my stepmother knowing her way around the pawnshops.

Or my sister being capable of eavesdropping while eating a chicken drumstick.

Mingzhu took a crumpled sheet from her sleeve.

“The day before the wedding, I went to the Pei house to deliver the sachet you'd forgotten. I heard Madam Jiang say that all it would take was a scene at the gate, and you'd have to bow your head.”

“She also said that once the chests were inside, there'd be no getting them back.”

“Why are you only telling me now?”

“I only heard those two sentences. I was afraid I'd misunderstood. I didn't dare tell you until I saw the pawn tickets today.”

Then she tapped her prayer block twice.

“Eavesdropping earns bad karma too. These prayers are for me.”

Madam Zhou looked at us with such dismay that her temples twitched.

I laid the three pawn tickets beside the list of missing items and Mingzhu's record of the date.

“Mother, aren't the Peis terribly eager to have my dowry chests?”

She grew wary at once.

“You are not actually giving them anything.”

“I'm only letting them look.”

I sent word to the Pei house that the Shens were willing to settle the matter privately.

If they stopped pursuing the accusation of unchastity, I would give them six dowry chests in exchange for my marriage contract and my reputation.

That evening, Pei Jinghe sent a reply himself.

He agreed.

5.

We arranged to meet at an unused old Shen residence in the west of the city.

Madam Zhou didn't want me to go.

“You've broken off the engagement. Why see him again? If we need evidence, we can take the pawn tickets to the magistrate.”

“The tickets only prove they tampered with the betrothal gifts. They don't prove they paid Zhao Er, much less that they blocked my sedan for the gifts. Madam Jiang can blame the servants, and Pei Jinghe can play innocent. At most, they'll return the goods and apologize.”

“That's enough.”

“It isn't.”

Her lips moved, but she didn't tell me to be magnanimous.

She merely turned to fetch a string of Buddhist prayer beads from the cabinet and slipped it over my wrist.

“Don't actually hurt anyone. If it can be settled before a magistrate, do it that way.”

Mingzhu poked her head around the door. “Don't worry, Mother. I've brought a sleeping drug.”

Madam Zhou nearly snapped the string of beads.

“Where did you get that?”

“I made it up.”

I patted the place beside me and told her to come in.

With a sister like this, only half of Mother's daily prayers were probably for me. The rest had to be reserved for her own daughter.

Only two lamps burned in the old house's main hall.

The moment Pei Jinghe entered, his eyes went to the six red lacquered chests along the wall.

He didn't ask how I'd been these past two days.

Just as well. If he'd suddenly brought up our past, I would have had to sit with him even longer.

He placed a document on the table.

“Once the Pei family receives the six dowry chests, Mother will acknowledge that the business with Zhao Er was a misunderstanding. She won't mention your unchastity again. We'll tell people you've suddenly fallen seriously ill and the wedding has been postponed.”

“Postponed?”

“Once this has died down, if you're willing, I can still marry you.”

I was almost moved by his generosity.

“And if I'm not willing?”

“Zhiwei, after today, you won't find a better match than the Pei family. Give me your dowry, and I'll protect your reputation. We can still be husband and wife.”

“Why didn't you stop your mother from slandering me in the street?”

He avoided my eyes.

“She did it for the family. You have so much dowry. A few chests won't make life impossible. Once I have an official post, I'll make it up to you.”

I looked at the document.

Seven years of knowing each other lay on that table, and still weighed less than those six chests.

Pei Jinghe and I hadn't fallen in love at first sight.

When I was sixteen, he'd helped me restrain a frightened horse at the riding grounds. The reins had cut his palm, but he hadn't let go. After that, he often visited the Shen house. He remembered that I didn't eat ginger and brought soft pastries for Grandmother. I'd thought a man who paid attention to such small things couldn't be a bad husband.

Looking back, he'd certainly remembered.

But he'd remembered because marrying me had been to his advantage then. Once the Peis needed money, my dislike of ginger ranked below six dowry chests.

I didn't regret having misjudged him.

At sixteen, I could only see what he chose to show me. At twenty-three, watching him write this document with his own hand, I could no longer keep myself blind.

He could take a little of my reputation, a little of my dowry, then a little of my spirit. Never very much at a time. If I objected, I would be the unreasonable one.

I could reckon that account clearly enough.

“There's a sentence missing.”

I had a maid bring brush and ink.

“State that none of the accusations of unchastity made at the gate today are supported by solid evidence, and that once the Pei family receives six dowry chests, it will pursue the matter no further.”

Pei Jinghe frowned. “Put that bluntly, it won't look good if it gets out.”

“There are no outsiders here. Or don't you dare write it?”

He feared I'd change my mind. He feared losing those six chests even more.

In the end, he did as I asked, signing and sealing the document. Madam Jiang hadn't come, but she'd sent a trusted servant to press her thumbprint in the space for a witness.

I put the document away.

Pei Jinghe reached out to stop me. “The chest keys?”

“We choose an auspicious hour for a wedding. We should do the same for breaking an engagement. Bring your men at the Zi hour tomorrow, around midnight.”

He stared at the chests several more times before leaving.

The moment he was gone, Mingzhu emerged from behind the screen.

“Sister, will he really come?”

“Yes. The document says the Shens will hand over the chests. If he uses the main gate, brings witnesses, and counts them properly, he'll only be collecting goods under an agreement. But Madam Jiang will be afraid we'll change our minds. She'll also be afraid people will find out she traded rumors for my dowry. She'll insist he move them in secret.”

“What if he insists on doing everything openly?”

“Then we'll lock the real dowry chests in the storeroom and refuse to hand them over. He's already admitted there's no solid evidence. Either way, we lose nothing.”

I wasn't some all-knowing prophet.

I'd simply given the Peis two paths.

Take the honest one, and they wouldn't get the dowry. Take the crooked one, and I'd be waiting.

Mingzhu opened the six red chests and filled them with stones and old sutras.

Under the covered walkway, Madam Zhou arranged the house guards while counting her beads and chanting.

After a while, she stopped to ask, “Aren't the stones too heavy? What if someone gets hurt?”

I said they wouldn't.

She chanted a little longer.

“Don't use old sutras. If the Buddha sees us using them to trick people, he'll blame us.”

Mingzhu sighed. “Mother, we're catching thieves. Could you stop worrying about whether the sutras are old or new?”

Madam Zhou considered this seriously, then had the contents replaced with six chests of broken roof tiles.

Roof tiles, she said, weren't under the Buddha's jurisdiction. Using them to deceive someone wouldn't count as sacrilege.

Just before the Zi hour, a dull thud came from the old house's rear wall.

Pei Jinghe had arrived.

6.

His personal servant was the first over the wall.

He opened the back gate, and more than ten burly men filed in.

Pei Jinghe came last, his robe hem covered in dust.

“Quickly. Everything must be gone before dawn.”

He kept his voice low, but I heard every word from the room beside the hall.

As the first man lifted a chest, the courtyard gate shut.

Shen guards stepped out on either side. They carried no blades, only long staves and lanterns. Behind them came the neighborhood headman, two night watchmen, and three neighbors I'd invited for tea that afternoon.

The moment the lanterns lit up, Pei Jinghe covered his face.

I stepped out beneath the walkway.

“Aren't you here to collect the chests as agreed, Young Master Pei? With a perfectly good gate to use, why climb the wall?”

“You set a trap for me.”

“Your servant opened the back gate. You brought the men. You ordered them to move the chests. All I did was light the lanterns. How have I wronged you?”

He snatched a staff from one of his men and charged toward the wall.

The guards blocked him, and the two sides began shoving. Madam Zhou emerged from a room, white with fear, but still remembered to pull Mingzhu and me farther back.

Clutching her prayer block, Mingzhu shouted, “Not the face! We'll need to identify him in court tomorrow!”

After about an hour of confusion, Pei Jinghe and his men were all tied up.

The six chests stood in the middle of the courtyard.

The headman inspected them on the spot. They contained nothing but broken tiles. At the bottom of each was a notice: “This chest belongs to the Shen family's old residence. It contains discarded roof tiles and is not part of the dowry.”

Pei Jinghe cursed my viciousness.

“The document clearly says six dowry chests! You tricked me with broken tiles!”

I spread out the document he'd written himself.

“Read it again. It only says the Shens will hand over six chests. No chest numbers. No dowry inventory. You were so eager to have Madam Jiang put her thumbprint on it that you didn't read carefully.”

“You just said they were dowry chests!”

“I said chests. My dowry is all you think about, so it's all you hear.”

That was deliberate sophistry.

But sophistry has one advantage. As long as the other person abandons reason first, I don't feel guilty.

Madam Zhou began counting her beads again.

Pei Jinghe struggled against his bonds. “We're betrothed! How is taking my fiancée's things theft?”

“The marriage contract has been cut in half. Even if it hadn't, the dowry belongs to the Shens until the wedding. You had no key and no permission from the owner. You climbed the wall in the middle of the night and brought men to carry off the chests. The headman and the watchmen saw it all.”

A watchman nodded. “Very clearly. Young Master Pei even said it all had to be gone before dawn.”

Pei Jinghe said no more.

At daybreak, we took them to the Capital Prefecture.

Zhao Er had been in custody for two days.

At first, he'd insisted he admired me and had acted out of spite after being rejected. The moment he heard Pei Jinghe had been brought in too, he changed his statement. The plan was Madam Jiang's, he said. The money and clothes had come from Pei Jinghe.

I didn't go into the jail to hear it. A prefectural clerk gave me a copy of his statement and asked me to check the dates and people named in it.

When Madam Jiang rushed to the magistrate's, she hadn't even finished doing her hair.

Her first question wasn't whether Pei Jinghe had been hurt. It was where the six chests were.

When she learned they held nothing but tiles, her legs gave way.

Beside me, Mingzhu whispered, “Sister, she really does love those chests.”

“She loves Pei Jinghe too.”

“I can't see it.”

“If she didn't, how could she bear to let him go to prison all by himself?”

Mingzhu wanted to laugh, but thought it improper outside the courtroom. She lowered her head and tapped her prayer block twice instead.

Madam Jiang soon turned the accusation back on me. I'd slandered her before the bridal sedan by claiming she was having an affair with her husband's son, she said. Then I'd used false chests to deceive Pei Jinghe. That was the cause of everything.

She wanted to sue me for defaming a titled official's wife.

The capital prefect asked whether I admitted it.

I said I did.

Madam Jiang brightened at once.

I continued, “I certainly have no evidence.”

“You heard her!” She grabbed a bailiff's sleeve. “She admitted it herself!”

The prefect struck his sounding block.