Chapter 1

Drunk, I clung to the aloof roommate I had a secret crush on and blurted everything out.

“You know, I’m intersex… I wonder if the guy I like would find me disgusting.”

Xu Zizhou’s breathing grew heavier, but he hauled me into the bathroom with a look of chilly disdain.

Cold water poured over my head. I was about to call him crazy when I suddenly heard his thoughts.

【Snakes hate alcohol.】
【Damn it, my tail’s about to come out.】
【So if my wife’s intersex… and I have two… doesn’t that mean we could…】
【Oh my god. My wife and I were made for each other!】

At our research group meeting, our professor excitedly announced that he had discovered a great literary talent.

He couldn’t wait to show us the work.

I looked up at the big screen, happily munching on a snack.

A moment later, my latest submission appeared on the PowerPoint slide.

I stopped smiling.

“Shu Chi, this reads like a novel,” the professor said. “Where were you planning to submit it? Yilin? Duzhe?

“I believe they print jokes on the last page. Yours would fit right in.”

He gave me a smile of doom.

I could practically read his expression.

Go home, son. Please, just go home. You’d make a much better lump of uselessness.

He shook his head and sighed.

“Shu Chi, keep this up and you’ll be warned about delaying your graduation. Why don’t you learn from your roommate? Xu Zizhou has already had a paper accepted by an SCI Q1 journal!”

Xu Zizhou again!

Taller than me. Bigger than me. Better-looking. Smarter.

Even the little beauty mark beside his eye was perfect.

After the meeting, I went drinking to drown my sorrows. I counted his good points on my fingers.

The more I counted, the more I wanted him.

My best friend, Lin Feng, helpfully added, “Pecs, abs, two SCI Q1 papers, one SSCI paper, three academic journal articles.”

He slung an arm around my shoulders, smirked, and whispered like a devil.

“And you, my friend… have nothing.”

I couldn’t take it anymore.

I couldn’t write my thesis. I wanted to drop out.

Then inspiration struck Lin Feng.

“Hey, I’ve got a plan. You have a crush on him, right? Go for it! Confess! If he says yes, you can be his academic Daji—seduce the genius and enjoy the benefits. If he says no, tell him the rejection left you depressed and make him compensate you with a coauthor credit. Why wait for the perfect day? Do it today! Have another drink. Liquid courage!”

That evening, the traitor delivered me back to the dorm, thoroughly drunk.

He even undid two buttons on my shirt and tugged the collar open, exposing my pale, slender collarbones.

Then he rubbed the corners of my eyes red with his thumb and added two drops of eye drops, making them shine.

Satisfied, he grinned.

“That’s it! Like you’re about to cry. Painfully cute. If we weren’t both the same type, I’d fall for you myself.”

Finally, he produced a tube of deep pink lip gloss and carefully applied it, leaving my lips full and wet-looking.

Like a fussy mother, he reminded me, “You remember the plan? Hug him. Seduce him. Confess. Got it?”

I nodded, my heart pounding.

He dragged me to our room and knocked.

The graduate dorms at C University had two occupants per room.

Xu Zizhou answered in loose pajamas.

Tall and pale, his long limbs hidden beneath dark gray sleeves, he somehow looked impossibly off-limits.

“Hey, Xu. I’m Shu Chi’s friend. He’s had a bad day and a little too much to drink. Could you look after him tonight? Sorry for the trouble.”

Lin Feng winked at me.

Taking my cue, I flushed and stumbled into Xu Zizhou’s arms.

My acting was atrocious.

“Oh no, I’m so dizzy, I’m going to faint…”

He had just showered.

The air smelled of mint body wash.

Cool and clean, as though an entire field of mint had been crushed into it.

My nose landed against his chest, firm beneath its yielding warmth.

That fresh scent filled every breath.

It felt wonderful.

I couldn’t help nuzzling a little closer.

The lingering steam made me dizzy. My body went soft, threatening to slide to the floor.

Xu Zizhou caught my waist at once, his other hand supporting the back of my head.

We were pressed together without a gap.

My eyes widened.

I froze.

So big…

Wait. Abnormally big…

He seemed to notice something too. He stepped back a little, putting space between us.

His cool voice came from above my head.

“Sure. It’s fine.”

His voice was low and magnetic.

My ears burned. I nearly dropped to my knees and called him Daddy.

Lin Feng thanked him repeatedly and fled.

The door clicked shut.

Only Xu Zizhou and I remained.

I was dizzy, but I still remembered my assignment.

Summoning my courage, I wrapped my arms tightly around his waist and looked up at him, lips pressed together.

My face felt hot enough to fry an egg.

I was attracted to intelligence.

And beauty.

Xu Zizhou was exactly my type in both respects.

One of the department’s top researchers, with a face good enough to debut as an idol.

The first time I met him, an old question suddenly became real.

If someone that dazzling came into my life, would I ever be worthy of standing beside him?

That was why I had worked so hard.

My notebooks were crammed with formulas.

Dozens of revisions of my thesis filled my computer.

I wanted to catch up.

To stand beside him.

As an equal.

But sometimes, effort simply couldn’t make up for talent.

Whenever I compared my work to his, the gap felt as wide as the Milky Way.

It wasn’t as though he had never offered to help me.

But because I liked him, because I wanted to earn my place beside him, I always refused.

The academic Daji business was only a joke.

When you liked someone, how could you be content to become his shadow?

The thought made me want to retreat.

I was naturally shy, quick to feel inferior.

But I had drunk too much that day.

The moment I let go of him, my knees buckled.

Xu Zizhou caught me and drew me back into his arms.

Strange.

His body was so cold.

“Careful.”

His arm encircled my waist. Through the thin fabric, his cool palm settled into the hollow of my back.

I kept my head down, too stiff with nerves to look up, and mumbled a thank-you.

My heart had launched itself into space.

He was really holding me.

Really!

“You were upset today?” he asked softly. “Because of what the professor said? I could help—”

“No… that’s not…”

I cut him off.

“Then what’s wrong?”

He lowered his head. His lashes cast little shadows.

I found myself staring at the silver necklace against his chest.

It was a souvenir from last year’s conference.

I had an identical one. I had even joked that they were matching couple necklaces.

I never expected him to keep wearing it.

I shut my eyes and took the plunge.

“It wasn’t the scolding… It’s… I… I like someone. He’s so amazing, I don’t dare make a move…”

The alcohol surged up.

My head spun.

Clinging to Xu Zizhou like an octopus, I nuzzled his collarbone and mumbled, “He’s amazing. Handsome. Brilliant… Like you.

“And I’ve got nothing.

“Do you think… No, would he think I’m stupid?”

I had heard that top students hated idiots.

I only got into C University because someone ahead of me gave up their place.

Xu Zizhou had been recommended internally for admission.

He really was exceptional.

Inferiority washed over me.

I felt like a clumsily stuck-on Band-Aid.

At last, I pushed him away, lowered my head, and blurted, “And… I’m intersex… I don’t know whether the guy I like would find me disgusting…”

His breathing grew heavier.

But his expression stayed cold as he hauled me into the bathroom.

Cold water poured down.

I was about to swear at him when I heard his thoughts.

【My wife is only allowed to like me. I have to find out who that bastard is.】
【Snakes hate alcohol.】

【Damn it, I can’t hold it in. I can’t. My tail’s about to come out!】
【So if my wife’s intersex… and I have two… couldn’t we do one in front and one behind?】
【Oh my god. My wife and I were made for each other!】